tell it to my face tonight

so i'm pretty freakin' bored. and i have been too lazy to write in this lately, i don't really know why seeing as i've had plenty of time on my hands. oh well. today is the last day of the year and though it shouldn't be a big deal, i make it one but i get sad when anything ends so i suppose it's only natural that i'm upset about the year ending. on the other hand, a new year is about to start and it can only get better from here...hopefully not worse..knock on wood. anyway...

christmas this year was good. for once nobody in my family cried over what they did or didn't get. i pretty much got all i wanted. examples...vera bradley duffel, new a&f winter coat, socks, clothes. and i just spent a little over 300 on a new coach bag that i wanted. so there goes all my christmas money...and more. oh well. it was a really nice bag and they weren't selling online anymore..and it was the last one in the store so...i mean...you know, i had to do what i had to do. lol.

alright back to business...i saved this blog as a "draft" ...because i was not done with it. now that i have some free time and i actually feel like rambling on this, i will continue where i left off. now first things first. it is now a new year. WOO HOO. happy new year, bitches. it's hard to believe it's 2007 already..boy does time fly when you're havin' fun...or not. but yeah the year did go by fast and i'm already a second semester freshman in college. it sucks that we start back up next monday..so a week from today but i think routine is good for me because this whole being on break doing nothing being lazy is only fun for so long. but yeah so i'm a little nervous about that but i'm sure (i hope) i will be just fine. alright let's talk about that for a minute. my fine-ness. not like THAT but i mean my mental and physical health...i suppose you would call that wellness..not fine-ness. anywho...lately i haven't been feeling too good and i haven't really come to a conclusion of why that is. i've been having headaches like it's my job. tension headaches and if you don't know what those are then google it. but they suck. i shouldn't have them right now. especially because i'm doing like all of nothing on break. what's there to be tense about i mean really. but i did a little research online and i found that alot of people that have anxiety and depression suffer from frequent tension headaches so there's part of my solution. arghhh. i ask God like everyday why me? haha. why did i get the shitty genes where like everything goes wrong in my life. okay maybe not everything but that's another part of the problem. i'm basically the biggest pessimist in the world. maybe in the universe, i'm not sure. to me, everything is going to be bad. and honestly, i'm right about 60% of the time, which if you're retarded, is more than half of the time. and then the other 40% of the time i'm wrong, and things turn out fine. but i really do have bad luck and you can ask anyone that knows me. anyway i'm going to see the doctor about my messed up head so i'll let you know how that goes.

okay so since it is a new year, one must make resolutions. kristen and i...resoluted....lol...whatever. we decided that we are going to give up sugar until the end of lent, starting today though. so it's been hard because i love anything sweet but i still haven't broken the..deal. so that's good. i'm excited to see where this goes. hopefully it goes to me being able to fit in my pants better lol. well uh...that's about it. devlin is back at home for a few more days because he didn't get scheduled to work which was the whole reason he came back to charlotte a week early so that sucked for him and i feel bad. but it also sucks he's gone again because that means i'm bored to death. oh well. oh yeah and speaking of work i had an interview at starbucks yesterday...we'll hear the big news tomorrow if i get the job or not.. oh joy. movie time. bye.

phat girlz for lyfe

so tonight i watched the movie phat girlz which i now understand means "pretty hot and thick" haha. i feel them. i mean i know i'm not fat...well...they're level of fat anyway, but i understand how they feel. my family thought it was a bad movie and while it wasn't the best ever i think it still had a good message behind it and had a cute storyline going. anywho, just want to let all the bigger girls out there know that nobody's going to love you until you love yourself. and some people just aren't going to ever be a size 2 because they aren't meant to be. which is my case lol. a 6 yes, but a 2...that's just not in the cards. okay well enough about phat girlz...

today i got up at around 11 and my mom and i went to lunch at panera. i haven't been there in a really long time..since we've been home in MD. so that was good. we also went to hollywood video and i got 2 movies, including phat girlz and click but i haven't watched click yet. then we went to the bank to adjust my savings account and other junk. i watched the tyra show today which has become the new oprah for me lately since oprah is all reruns at the moment. tyra is actually really good. today's episode was reunions and it was a tearjerker but i held it in, surprisingly haha. speaking of tearjerkers....

devlin left yesterday morning to go back to greenville and that leaves me here in charlotte by my lonesome. i miss him uber amounts already :( but he'll be back soon enough i guess. we exchanged christmas presents last friday before we went to dinner and to see "the pursuit of happiness" (pretty good by the way) and he got me this brighton watch that i really wanted...along with some brighton earrings he picked out all by himself! i got him clothes, the da vinci code dvd, pens, chocolate, and this butterfly knife he wanted really badly..hopefully he doesn't end up killing me with it lol (knock on wood) but yeah...gah he's so cute. i don't know what i'd do without him. i'm really very lucky. well...nothing else is really new..i can't wait until christmas though!! oh yeah...song of the week is "some hearts" by carrie underwood. here are the lyrics:

I've never been the kind that you call lucky
Always stumblin' around in circles
but I must've stumbled into something
Look at me, am I really alone with you?
I wake up feeling like my life's worth livin'
Can't recall when I last felt that way
Guess it must be all this love you're givin'
Never knew, never knewit could be like this...
But I guess

Some hearts, they just get all the right breaks
Some hearts have the stars on their side
Some hearts, they just have it so easy
Some hearts just get lucky sometimes
Some hearts just get lucky, lucky sometimes...

Now who'd have thought someone like you could love me?
You're the last thing my heart expected
Who'd have thought I'd ever find somebody
Someone who, someone who... makes me feel like this...
Well, I guess

Some hearts, they just get all the right breaks
Some hearts have the stars on their side
Some hearts, they just have it so easy
Some hearts just get lucky sometimes
Some hearts just get lucky
Sometimes...ooh...

Even hearts like mine
Get lucky, lucky sometimes!
Even hearts like mine!


aww yay i love it. haha it's my life story. alright well for some reason i'm tired so i'm going to bed. night!

baby i wish it were cold outside

So today I had my last final. FINALLY! And it was really, really hard. Also, I was sick this morning so that didn't help. It was terrible and only something like that would happen to me. Infact, I had to leave in the middle of my global exam because I thought I was going to either pass out or puke everywhere. So I went to the bathroom and almost died, but then I gathered up the strength to go back in. After recovering I finished the test as best I could..."I DID MY BEST x 234" ahahaha (Dane Cook). I'm really happy it's all over now. I packed up a few of my things and my dad picked me up to come home! WOO HOOOOOOO.

So I am home at the moment and I'm waiting for Devlin to get here because we're going to dinner for no reason then we are going to see "The Pursuit of Happiness" which I am uber excited to see. I'll let you know how it goes. But yeah....umm...besides that things went alright today. I am SO glad that exams and the first semester is over with. It's kind of bittersweet. I am going to miss being at school...but not going to school...get it? haha. I do wish I was going home to MD again because I want to see everyone..but I don't think that's going to happen. *tear* Oh well.....I need to get ready to go out now. Bye!

boring nights with a touch of mascara

some day those scribble lines will be straight. what exactly does this lyric from "the blue roses" by rookie of the year mean? hmm....the world may never know. kidding. my take on it is that things will fall into place even if they are messed up now. haha. i don't know why i am writing this. i just upgraded my blog to some new blogger account with google thing and it's pretty cool i'm not gonna lie. so i thought i would start the new layout with a new blog. oh i'm so clever. i was reading kristens entry earlier and she said she tripped in her clogs and i thought that was hilarious. you just have to picture it and you will see. but anyway...

dev is at work and i'm at school just...hangin out. nicola and chris just watched the new dane cook vicious circle dvd me and dev got. that man completes my life. lol. oh man i am not kidding. now i am sitting here at my computero and christie is drawing stuff for her art class i'm listening to hilary duff christmas cd. speaking of my GIRL ahaha dude hilary duff "stuff " (her brand of like...clothes/accessories etc for girls) is coming out with an electronic toothbrush that plays "wake up" when you brush your teeth for 2 minutes. how amazing is that. i HAVE to get it. and elaborating on things i want, or am getting, my mom wrapped all the xmas presents already and put them under our tree. how rude. i like when santa comes in and there's new presents than the ones we already can see before xmas. she's so lazy errrrrrr. no spirit i tell ya!

today i had to present for freshman seminar my powerpoint on a career of my choice and i picked event planning. i just read off my slides the whole time and probably looked like a dumbass. i talk wayyy too fast but i don't really notice it until i'm done and i'm like out of breath. lol. i never want to take public speaking. that terrifies me. something else that teriffies me is the fact that NC may never get snow and that pisses me off because i am getting a new winter coat for christmas and i really want to wear it. i miss the snow. this whole living in the "south" may not be a permenent lifestyle change for me i'm thinking. who knows. i can't wait until the next season of laguna beach though, or the hills. random thought.

i had the most insane dream/nightmare last night. and one part of it kept reoccuring over and over....3 times to be exact. however, it would change everytime. basic summary of the dream went as follows: me and devlin go to a tanning salon but it's really weird and it's in a perfume store. you only get to tan for 5 minutes and you stand in little stalls that look like dressing rooms and its really uncomfortable. then we go to leave and the owner is the lead singer dan from this providence, but only for a little while. there's this other guy who is like obsessed with him and somehow this girl who i used to run with in high school is there. she tries to save me sort of. all i remember really is weird bits and pieces where in that salon/perfume store the dude and the girl i ran with are fighting and he is trying to kill her. i don't really know how this all ties together, i am forgetting parts that i remembered when i woke up but all i know is that i was freaked out and couldn't go back to sleep. i was sweating like i just ran a marathon and it was nast. so i just got up and took a shower. but yeah....creepy. well thats all the news i've got. cept that i took my pop culture final tonight and it was lame.

if roses didn't have petals then...what?

so i'm sitting here listening to the old this providence cd and i'm liking it alot, it's alot better than their new stuff...but yeah. i decided to listen to this instead of jamisonparker because kristen said she was. i don't know today was a really boring day. i got really stressed thinking my paper for freshman seminar was due today so i didn't go to any classes....shh! oh well. but ok now the paper is due wednesday so i ended up not doing anything this afternoon. gosh i am the picture next to the word lazy in the dictionary i swear. i need to stop procrastinating and just do things when i am supposed to! i know i knowwww.

i made a new calendar on my whiteboard for december since obviously november is over. i have this whole christmas section in green and red and i'm not gonna lie it looks pretty dang cool. i have a whole line that says HO! HO! HI! i'm really gay. lol. anywho...i really miss home already..i mean maryland. it was a really good thanksgiving up there by the way. i got to see almost every one of my friends and it was nice. we had some good times: making cookies, target, belk, firetruck rides, movies, parties, donut connection, and much more. but yeah home is such a breath of fresh air i guess you could say. i am still excited to go home to my house in charlotte though just to hangout. i love sitting around doing...nothing and staring at my tree lit up and looking lovely. oh and i can't wait to wrap presents and boy do i have alot to wrap i think i spent like 200 bucks on xmas presents this year. i need a job, but i don't want one..and i don't plan on getting one although i do need money and i would like my parents to stop bitching at me to get one. ughhh. we'll see.

it was devlin and i's (that's not the right wording but who cares) 3 month on the 30th and on friday we went out to uno's and ate and before we came back in the dorm he surprised me with 3 roses. he's so cuuuuuute. and i'm so lameeeeee. but yeah so i thought i'd share that with you all :)

wednesday is my last day of class. hallelujah!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! the jimmy eat world version of last christmas is the best song ever!!!!!!!!!!!!!! goodnight kiddies.