Sunday, December 31, 2006

tell it to my face tonight

so i'm pretty freakin' bored. and i have been too lazy to write in this lately, i don't really know why seeing as i've had plenty of time on my hands. oh well. today is the last day of the year and though it shouldn't be a big deal, i make it one but i get sad when anything ends so i suppose it's only natural that i'm upset about the year ending. on the other hand, a new year is about to start and it can only get better from here...hopefully not worse..knock on wood. anyway...

christmas this year was good. for once nobody in my family cried over what they did or didn't get. i pretty much got all i wanted. examples...vera bradley duffel, new a&f winter coat, socks, clothes. and i just spent a little over 300 on a new coach bag that i wanted. so there goes all my christmas money...and more. oh well. it was a really nice bag and they weren't selling online anymore..and it was the last one in the store so...i know, i had to do what i had to do. lol.

alright back to business...i saved this blog as a "draft" ...because i was not done with it. now that i have some free time and i actually feel like rambling on this, i will continue where i left off. now first things first. it is now a new year. WOO HOO. happy new year, bitches. it's hard to believe it's 2007 already..boy does time fly when you're havin' fun...or not. but yeah the year did go by fast and i'm already a second semester freshman in college. it sucks that we start back up next a week from today but i think routine is good for me because this whole being on break doing nothing being lazy is only fun for so long. but yeah so i'm a little nervous about that but i'm sure (i hope) i will be just fine. alright let's talk about that for a minute. my fine-ness. not like THAT but i mean my mental and physical health...i suppose you would call that wellness..not fine-ness. anywho...lately i haven't been feeling too good and i haven't really come to a conclusion of why that is. i've been having headaches like it's my job. tension headaches and if you don't know what those are then google it. but they suck. i shouldn't have them right now. especially because i'm doing like all of nothing on break. what's there to be tense about i mean really. but i did a little research online and i found that alot of people that have anxiety and depression suffer from frequent tension headaches so there's part of my solution. arghhh. i ask God like everyday why me? haha. why did i get the shitty genes where like everything goes wrong in my life. okay maybe not everything but that's another part of the problem. i'm basically the biggest pessimist in the world. maybe in the universe, i'm not sure. to me, everything is going to be bad. and honestly, i'm right about 60% of the time, which if you're retarded, is more than half of the time. and then the other 40% of the time i'm wrong, and things turn out fine. but i really do have bad luck and you can ask anyone that knows me. anyway i'm going to see the doctor about my messed up head so i'll let you know how that goes.

okay so since it is a new year, one must make resolutions. kristen and we decided that we are going to give up sugar until the end of lent, starting today though. so it's been hard because i love anything sweet but i still haven't broken so that's good. i'm excited to see where this goes. hopefully it goes to me being able to fit in my pants better lol. well uh...that's about it. devlin is back at home for a few more days because he didn't get scheduled to work which was the whole reason he came back to charlotte a week early so that sucked for him and i feel bad. but it also sucks he's gone again because that means i'm bored to death. oh well. oh yeah and speaking of work i had an interview at starbucks yesterday...we'll hear the big news tomorrow if i get the job or not.. oh joy. movie time. bye.

Tuesday, December 19, 2006

phat girlz for lyfe

so tonight i watched the movie phat girlz which i now understand means "pretty hot and thick" haha. i feel them. i mean i know i'm not fat...well...they're level of fat anyway, but i understand how they feel. my family thought it was a bad movie and while it wasn't the best ever i think it still had a good message behind it and had a cute storyline going. anywho, just want to let all the bigger girls out there know that nobody's going to love you until you love yourself. and some people just aren't going to ever be a size 2 because they aren't meant to be. which is my case lol. a 6 yes, but a 2...that's just not in the cards. okay well enough about phat girlz...

today i got up at around 11 and my mom and i went to lunch at panera. i haven't been there in a really long time..since we've been home in MD. so that was good. we also went to hollywood video and i got 2 movies, including phat girlz and click but i haven't watched click yet. then we went to the bank to adjust my savings account and other junk. i watched the tyra show today which has become the new oprah for me lately since oprah is all reruns at the moment. tyra is actually really good. today's episode was reunions and it was a tearjerker but i held it in, surprisingly haha. speaking of tearjerkers....

devlin left yesterday morning to go back to greenville and that leaves me here in charlotte by my lonesome. i miss him uber amounts already :( but he'll be back soon enough i guess. we exchanged christmas presents last friday before we went to dinner and to see "the pursuit of happiness" (pretty good by the way) and he got me this brighton watch that i really wanted...along with some brighton earrings he picked out all by himself! i got him clothes, the da vinci code dvd, pens, chocolate, and this butterfly knife he wanted really badly..hopefully he doesn't end up killing me with it lol (knock on wood) but yeah...gah he's so cute. i don't know what i'd do without him. i'm really very lucky. well...nothing else is really new..i can't wait until christmas though!! oh of the week is "some hearts" by carrie underwood. here are the lyrics:

I've never been the kind that you call lucky
Always stumblin' around in circles
but I must've stumbled into something
Look at me, am I really alone with you?
I wake up feeling like my life's worth livin'
Can't recall when I last felt that way
Guess it must be all this love you're givin'
Never knew, never knewit could be like this...
But I guess

Some hearts, they just get all the right breaks
Some hearts have the stars on their side
Some hearts, they just have it so easy
Some hearts just get lucky sometimes
Some hearts just get lucky, lucky sometimes...

Now who'd have thought someone like you could love me?
You're the last thing my heart expected
Who'd have thought I'd ever find somebody
Someone who, someone who... makes me feel like this...
Well, I guess

Some hearts, they just get all the right breaks
Some hearts have the stars on their side
Some hearts, they just have it so easy
Some hearts just get lucky sometimes
Some hearts just get lucky

Even hearts like mine
Get lucky, lucky sometimes!
Even hearts like mine!

aww yay i love it. haha it's my life story. alright well for some reason i'm tired so i'm going to bed. night!

Friday, December 15, 2006

baby i wish it were cold outside

So today I had my last final. FINALLY! And it was really, really hard. Also, I was sick this morning so that didn't help. It was terrible and only something like that would happen to me. Infact, I had to leave in the middle of my global exam because I thought I was going to either pass out or puke everywhere. So I went to the bathroom and almost died, but then I gathered up the strength to go back in. After recovering I finished the test as best I could..."I DID MY BEST x 234" ahahaha (Dane Cook). I'm really happy it's all over now. I packed up a few of my things and my dad picked me up to come home! WOO HOOOOOOO.

So I am home at the moment and I'm waiting for Devlin to get here because we're going to dinner for no reason then we are going to see "The Pursuit of Happiness" which I am uber excited to see. I'll let you know how it goes. But yeah....umm...besides that things went alright today. I am SO glad that exams and the first semester is over with. It's kind of bittersweet. I am going to miss being at school...but not going to school...get it? haha. I do wish I was going home to MD again because I want to see everyone..but I don't think that's going to happen. *tear* Oh well.....I need to get ready to go out now. Bye!

Wednesday, December 13, 2006

boring nights with a touch of mascara

some day those scribble lines will be straight. what exactly does this lyric from "the blue roses" by rookie of the year mean? hmm....the world may never know. kidding. my take on it is that things will fall into place even if they are messed up now. haha. i don't know why i am writing this. i just upgraded my blog to some new blogger account with google thing and it's pretty cool i'm not gonna lie. so i thought i would start the new layout with a new blog. oh i'm so clever. i was reading kristens entry earlier and she said she tripped in her clogs and i thought that was hilarious. you just have to picture it and you will see. but anyway...

dev is at work and i'm at school just...hangin out. nicola and chris just watched the new dane cook vicious circle dvd me and dev got. that man completes my life. lol. oh man i am not kidding. now i am sitting here at my computero and christie is drawing stuff for her art class i'm listening to hilary duff christmas cd. speaking of my GIRL ahaha dude hilary duff "stuff " (her brand of like...clothes/accessories etc for girls) is coming out with an electronic toothbrush that plays "wake up" when you brush your teeth for 2 minutes. how amazing is that. i HAVE to get it. and elaborating on things i want, or am getting, my mom wrapped all the xmas presents already and put them under our tree. how rude. i like when santa comes in and there's new presents than the ones we already can see before xmas. she's so lazy errrrrrr. no spirit i tell ya!

today i had to present for freshman seminar my powerpoint on a career of my choice and i picked event planning. i just read off my slides the whole time and probably looked like a dumbass. i talk wayyy too fast but i don't really notice it until i'm done and i'm like out of breath. lol. i never want to take public speaking. that terrifies me. something else that teriffies me is the fact that NC may never get snow and that pisses me off because i am getting a new winter coat for christmas and i really want to wear it. i miss the snow. this whole living in the "south" may not be a permenent lifestyle change for me i'm thinking. who knows. i can't wait until the next season of laguna beach though, or the hills. random thought.

i had the most insane dream/nightmare last night. and one part of it kept reoccuring over and over....3 times to be exact. however, it would change everytime. basic summary of the dream went as follows: me and devlin go to a tanning salon but it's really weird and it's in a perfume store. you only get to tan for 5 minutes and you stand in little stalls that look like dressing rooms and its really uncomfortable. then we go to leave and the owner is the lead singer dan from this providence, but only for a little while. there's this other guy who is like obsessed with him and somehow this girl who i used to run with in high school is there. she tries to save me sort of. all i remember really is weird bits and pieces where in that salon/perfume store the dude and the girl i ran with are fighting and he is trying to kill her. i don't really know how this all ties together, i am forgetting parts that i remembered when i woke up but all i know is that i was freaked out and couldn't go back to sleep. i was sweating like i just ran a marathon and it was nast. so i just got up and took a shower. but yeah....creepy. well thats all the news i've got. cept that i took my pop culture final tonight and it was lame.

Monday, December 04, 2006

if roses didn't have petals then...what?

so i'm sitting here listening to the old this providence cd and i'm liking it alot, it's alot better than their new stuff...but yeah. i decided to listen to this instead of jamisonparker because kristen said she was. i don't know today was a really boring day. i got really stressed thinking my paper for freshman seminar was due today so i didn't go to any classes....shh! oh well. but ok now the paper is due wednesday so i ended up not doing anything this afternoon. gosh i am the picture next to the word lazy in the dictionary i swear. i need to stop procrastinating and just do things when i am supposed to! i know i knowwww.

i made a new calendar on my whiteboard for december since obviously november is over. i have this whole christmas section in green and red and i'm not gonna lie it looks pretty dang cool. i have a whole line that says HO! HO! HI! i'm really gay. lol. anywho...i really miss home already..i mean maryland. it was a really good thanksgiving up there by the way. i got to see almost every one of my friends and it was nice. we had some good times: making cookies, target, belk, firetruck rides, movies, parties, donut connection, and much more. but yeah home is such a breath of fresh air i guess you could say. i am still excited to go home to my house in charlotte though just to hangout. i love sitting around doing...nothing and staring at my tree lit up and looking lovely. oh and i can't wait to wrap presents and boy do i have alot to wrap i think i spent like 200 bucks on xmas presents this year. i need a job, but i don't want one..and i don't plan on getting one although i do need money and i would like my parents to stop bitching at me to get one. ughhh. we'll see.

it was devlin and i's (that's not the right wording but who cares) 3 month on the 30th and on friday we went out to uno's and ate and before we came back in the dorm he surprised me with 3 roses. he's so cuuuuuute. and i'm so lameeeeee. but yeah so i thought i'd share that with you all :)

wednesday is my last day of class. hallelujah!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! the jimmy eat world version of last christmas is the best song ever!!!!!!!!!!!!!! goodnight kiddies.

Monday, November 20, 2006

nothing is real i'm above it all, i'm hanging on

okay so i'm listening to that incredibly annoying song called "hanging on" by the everfamous cheyenne. aka the annoying blonde girl who had her own tv show on mtv. yeah her. well anyway, for some reason i can't get enough of her song and i hate it. oh well.

well i just got back from freshman seminar a little while ago and man that class is pointless but it's kind of the reason i like it, or..don't mind it that much. but yeah..then i went and got some food at the the best place ever, mondo subs. i got this chicken thing on wheat bread. it was pretty good. i have decided that i like my sandwiches toasted if its a cold day. what else...

my hands are cold and sweaty but what else is new? i only have one class tomorrow which is math at 2, and then i'm going home to pack and me and the fam are leavin to go to MD on wednesday morning, wooo hoooo! i am mega excited for this trip minus the fact that on monday when i get back i have a map quiz in global which i need to study for or else i'll like fail the class and we wouldn't want that now would we? my mom is freakin' making me apply at starbucks as my summer job because it's in the shopping center right by my house. lame but i don't know...we'll see.

i'm really lonely right now even though this is a normal feeling seeing as well i've been pretty much alone in a sense my whole life. not as in i'm an orphan or something and don't have family and friends. but i usually spend like 85% of my time with Devlin now and he just got a job at the Polo store so now he's working and I'm bored in my room. I guess you don't little things like this until they occur to you. But yeah anyway I guess i'll tv....or do some homework. ugh. happy thanksgiving everyone!

Wednesday, November 15, 2006

home alone and in need of a haircut

so it has come to my attention that i have not written in this stupid thing for like a month. well, half a month i guess. yeah because its the 15th and i need to change my contacts now. anyway, i feel bad about myself because kristen keeps up with hers so well. now i have to do one of those stupid summary posts because my life is passing by and you don't know what is happening to me. that sounded weird but whatever.

i have a pop culture test today and i really don't feel like studying quite yet although i should. it's pop culture i mean really...but i still want a good grade. i wrote this 10 page paper for my semester project in there and i'm not gonna lie, i think it was wicked good. i want it back and i better have gotten a good grade on it. onto other things, i really need a haircut. my bangs are far beyond what should even be categorized as bangs, and they need a cutting. ew. i hate split ends. room is pretty clean and we have inspection later tonight so i need to clean even more. oh and aw man laguna beach finale is on tonight, how sad. haha. oh wednesday nights will have to do with just one tree hill now. laskdnfsdfnsdf

gosh i cannot wait to go home, not to like my house i mean, because that's here in charlotte, but i mean home like MD. we're going there for thanksgiving and i'll be there all break. i'm so excited to see everyone you don't even know. one week! ahhh. :)

before i go study i should tell you about my giving blood misfortune. so i make two appointments for me and devlin to donate blood last wednesday at 2:30 for the red cross right. i get there and everythings going as planned. this time around i actually have good blood pressure so i'm good to go. i sit in the chair, yadda yadda, so i'm pumping blood into the little capri sun bag and having the time of my life when my hand turns purple and numb..i thought this may be normal until i start feeling really dizzy and cold and sweaty. yeah, apparently not a good sign. my vein wouldnt't give anymore blood so they're moving the needle around and telling me to squeeze on the little hand bar thing hard and it still doesn't get anything flowing. by the third time they called it quits on me after i almost passed out. that was scary. so now they can't use my blood, they have to "use it for research" and i think that's just a nice way of saying you didn't fill the whole bag so we have to throw it away...but who knows. i swear this kind of thing would only happen to me. i'm jealous because it was devlin's first time donating and he was fine. i'm still going to let them try again on me sometime next year. it'll be my life's goal.

damn. it's time to study.

Monday, October 30, 2006

this is what lamewods do

So we have this assignment in freshman seminar. It's a journal entry, and we generally turn them in once a week. Normally they're stupid things like How have you changed since you have been in college? This week it was a free write. FREE WRITE. I suppose that means you can write about anything. So I wrote mine..formal-ish blog style. I'm just going to copy and paste it here as an update. Here it is. Enjoy.

"For some reason free writes are always so confusing to me. I’m free…to write…whatever? To me that just leaves so many possibilities I can’t choose what to write about because I enjoy writing so much. For this entry, however, I think I’m just going to write as if it was a blog. A blog is an online journal, and I have two of them which I write in frequently. So…here it goes.
My thoughts right now are that I am really stressed and I need to get things done, but at the same time I am getting this journal done with so really I am doing work and should be proud of myself. It is the ten page paper Nicola and I have due Wednesday night that is killing me inside. We have not really started but it’s alright. The paper is for our Pop Culture class and we are writing it together on women and body issues influenced by the media. There is a ton of information on that subject so we should be fine. Also, I can ramble like it’s my job so I think we should be able to get a good length on the paper if I am writing. Anyway, another thing that is stressing me out is Wednesday because we are getting back our map quizzes and exams in Dr. Moore’s class. I am very nervous about this even though I know I studied and should get decent grades; it’s just the anticipation of not knowing that is causing me terrible anxiety. I always get like this though and I should know better than to worry because things will always work themselves out but I can’t help but feel so nervous about every little thing going on in my life. I just finished making my calendar for November so that should help me stay organized in my schoolwork. Speaking of the calendar for November, we have Thanksgiving break coming up and I am ecstatic because my family and I are going back to Maryland and I am going to get to see all of my best friends who I have not seen since August so that will be a lot of fun and I cannot wait!
Something that is also on my mind right now is how much I miss my past. I don’t really miss every little thing but I do miss some things that would just be weird doing or obsessing over now, yet…I still am. I know I am eighteen now and I am supposed to be mature or whatever but honestly I am so in love with the Disney channel. I just got the new Hannah Montana soundtrack and it is so awesome. I downloaded Jesse McCartney’s new album and I am even more excited about that. I used to be overly obsessed with the boy band Dreamstreet when I was in middle school. Jesse was a part of that band so I have been attached ever since. My roommates and my boyfriend think I have serious problems but really I don’t think it is that weird. Some people love the History channel until they die, and I think it’s alright if I loved the Disney channel until I die. But back to Jesse McCartney, I am really, really excited that I got his album and I probably won’t be able to sleep tonight because I will be listening to it and trying to memorize all of the lyrics. I know I am pretty much the biggest dork ever…or at least on this campus but it’s alright."

Yeah....I know that was gay and you probably cannot believe that I actually turned that into a professor but's just freshman seminar. You really can't take this class seriously, plus our teacher is nice. I'm sure she's laughing...hopefully anyway. Well yeah, that's about all that's new. Adios.

Sunday, October 15, 2006

histrionics, hammers, and hot flashes

well i don't exactly know where to start because like a hobo on crack i forgot how to write. specifically, i forgot how to write blogs which is terrible because gosh i really like expressing myself through this creative writing site. uh...but anyway yeah so i guess i've just gotten caught up in things going on around here lately and haven't written. be prepared to read what would sound like an earful. of nonsense.

so hmm..things are gooooooooood. i had to drop a class so now i feel dumb cause i'm not a fulltime student anymore but what can you do? last week was my birthday and that was a good time. i went to cary, NC where my suitemates are from. i stayed with nicola that weekend. on friday we chilled and then went to her friend Amanda's dorm at NC state which was cool, then we went to an 80s party then finally when it was about midnight it was my birthday and we all went to "the office" which is a club, and danced and such. it was fun. not as upscale as i guess i was expecting since all i have seen are clubs on tv but yeah lol. oh well. the next morning i slept in and nic had to go to work so kristi and her friend ashley came and picked me up around lunchtime and we went to this good mexican place called la rancheria. this is where it gets good. so i'm just sitting there with my back to the door and then all of a sudden they look at each other and smile and i'm like "wtf?" i turn around and guess who is there with a dozen roses!? DEVLIN. yeah and this is only so exciting because he wasn't supposed to be there on my bday cause he went home and had all these plans and things to do at home and they all led me to believe he would not be there. but so that was really sweet. the rest of the day we walked around the parade of homes and looked at million dollar houses in cary. then we had my birthday dinner and nic's mom made enchiladas and stuff, it was a whole mexican fiesta needless to say. then we had cake and ice cream and all the kids were there that go to uncc that live in cary too. later we went to some nc state frat party which was a school girl themed thing. yeah...hah. interesting. dev and i didn't stay long but i DID run into none other than RJ Allen, one of my best friends from 7th grade. I hadn't seen that kid in like 5 years. so that was really cool. besides that we just went to bed then the next day i went home to greenville with devlin and met his family and all. that was really fun too. finally on the way home to charlotte on monday, joey picked us up and guess what happened? well you probably have no idea but so yeah the tire just like all of a sudden blew up basically and we had to sit there on the side of the highway until the cop took him to buy a new one since the spare wouldn't fit. how lame. hah. that was adventure.

so my birthday was good. on friday my family and i and devlin went to the macaroni grill and then had my family party and that was funnnn. i got a new vera bradley bag, she's the man dvd, money, itunes card, clothes, and some other crap. oh yeah i forgot to write that my other surprise from devlin was getting my belly button pierced. yeah him and kristi told me we were going out to eat. yeah, that wasn't true. we went to this tattoo place. talk about wanting to shoot myself. i was really not ready for that but i did it anyway so i wouldn't be a party pooper and here i am still alive so i guess it wasn't so bad. all in all good 18th birthday. i can't believe i'm 18. gosh i feel so old and wrinkly ewwww. whatever its just a number lol disney is still my fav channel even though they changed disney 411 to disney 365 and it sounds retarded when they chant it but whatever.

i have some homework to do but i don't feel like it and that's not good. i need someone to kick me in the butt and make me do it. errr. do you know karate? cause your body's kickin! ahaha man i love that commerical. and the new skittles one that has that really annoying rabbit that just makes that terrifying noise haha. kills me everytime. i wish my blogs were as interesting as kristen's but hers are only good cause she writes like everyday and i could be more random and funny if i wrote everyday but instead i'm dumb and forget and then my entries end up being summaries of my life events. but its alright cause no one reads these and i just do it so i can look back and remember myself what happened because dude i have a horrible memory. i need to work on that. its getting colder here but i like it.

Saturday, September 23, 2006

allergies, headaches and animal planet

well i basically suck at life. i haven't kept up writing like i said i would. i don't know i guess i just forget. anyway today is saturday and it's over now which sucks because that means its almost sunday and i'll have to do work and get ready for monday aka a school day. darn.

so this last week was a decent one. it cooled down a little here and that was nice, but when it warmed up the last 2 days of course the ac went out time and time again and it was so hot. but we're good now. i think it's going to thunderstorm tomorrow. i love storms. yay. so this week...i skipped math on thursday. that was the first whole class i ever skipped. it's not like we do anything in there anyway. whatev. oh and i got a realllly shitty grade on my first global connections exam. let's not even go there. ughh. hmm...i had a bad migraine the other night and that sucked horribly. i've also been sneezing alot i think its allergies because of the changing seasons but who knows. haha.

dev and i went to see jackass 2 today and it was fucking....crazy. so fucking crazy. whoa. they are insane. but it was funny as shit so yeah. then we had dinner and my house and that was just...lovely. anywho...what else was i going to say...i don't know. i bought donnie darko so i think i might watch that..or just go to bed. i have alot of studying to do tomorrow. sdjfsodifhasd well night.

oh and i saw how crocodiles have sex on animal planet today. that was interesting.

Saturday, September 16, 2006

chocolate and ribs at the homefront

so i'm at home now. like that's news, what weekend haven't i gone home? i mean it is only 10 minutes away but still. it kind of sucks that my school is mostly a commuter school and alot of people are always driving and leaving campus all the time so weekends aren't the most exciting part of the week always. anyway i did my laundry and i went to walmart so i got a bunch of stuff i needed/wanted. we had good dinner too. better than crossroads and rdh needless to say.

so i'm obsessed with the song hero/heroine by boys like girls. i don't know why. it's a cute song, but yeah. i watched this uber weird movie today called the squid and the whale. dude i freakin' love indie movies, the sundance ones, the ones that noooo one ever rents cause there's only like one copy and plus people think they're just weird but for real they are always awesome and have a really weird story line and...point to them. anyway this one was about a conventional fucked up family in the 80's. you should rent it.

i miss high school. i know that's random but i was talking to heather last night and we reminicsed (sp) and talked about what we were up to now. i guess i moved on in life pretty..what's the word..smoothly? but when i think about the fact that high school is over it's pretty upsetting and it makes me depressed. i watch laguna beach and i miss the stupid drama haha i mean it's stupid alright but i mean come on, if those were the least of your problems than you should consider yourself lucky. i don't know, it's just the little things i miss. and definitely my friends. i wish that when i came "home" like i am now, it was to my actual HOME aka smc. oh well what can ya do?

we had a really high water bill ($93.41) this month and it's not my fault. i don't even live here.

Thursday, September 14, 2006

rewinding thoughts and violins

awh, remember to kiss the ones you love goodnight. i don't know where that came from. maybe uh, this song. anyway. i decided that since i'm not doing anything i might as well waste my time sitting here on my computer writing. i want to write twice a week. that really shouldn't be that hard.

at the moment my roommates are painting their nails and devlin (bf) is watching football. umd v. wvu to be more specific and umd is getting beat. badly. that sucks....ahah. steph said it's humiliating that it's on tv. guess she didn't know. i wish that uncc had a football team, i don't know why they don't. stupid. oh well. it's not like i'm really into football anyway but i enjoy having a sporting event to go to in the fall that's actually entertaining. basketball should be fun this winter though.

today i went to the dentist. i haven't yet had my teeth cleaned here in nc since i moved here this summer. they did a good job. but i am super upset. i have my first cavity. i'm still in shock, and they haven't filled it yet but i'm scared. they told me i need to floss more. goshh what a pain, i mean really, who flosses on a daily basis, be honest. i know you don't so shut up. and if you really do,'re weird ok. anywho, that was a load of fun. after the dentist my dad dropped me off at school and i had to go to freakin math class and listen to my african math teacher, and when i say african i mean african, he is actually from africa like accent and all. he's pretty funny actually. anyway we reviewed really easy and boring stuff and that only lasted half an hour, and that was my only class of the day so that was a relief. tonight was italian night at crossroads which is cafe on campus. it was pretty good. i'm full. now i'm sitting here doing nothing. and boy do i hate homework that you have to do online. ugh. gag me with a spoon as someone i know would say. hahah. i don't know.

the fan is blowing right in my face and it's making my eyes dry...this is the end of this blog. until next time....

Monday, September 11, 2006

big cities, short periods of time, and cool weather

not only is it right or well...not right but...nice and well i can't think of the correct words really. but i think i should at least write a new blog today because first of all its 9/11 (06 of course) and also because i haven't updated in like...quite some time and that's not acceptable! well to me it isn't. i want to be able to remember these days. as lame as that sounds. but anyway. today is probably a really sad and memorable day for some and i'll be praying for them. enough said. umm...

what's new....not a whole whole lot. i have been sick for awhile but i think i'm finally getting better. i had a cough. it sucked. also...went home last weekend. it was boring but at least i got to see the fam, not that i don't see them like every week anyway, oh well. the days have been passing by pretty fast now. things are getting into routine and before we know it i bet it will be my birthday and more breaks from school. which is good. i can't wait til i turn 18. then again i can because i'll be legal and there's both pros and cons to that. no excuse for acting childish anymore haha. i'm still going to watch disney channel.

today we had a map quiz in global connections which i felt thoroughly prepared for, but i stil think my nerves got the best of me and i screwed up a few. i still think i'll get a decent grade and that's all that matters really. now i just have to get down to business in my other classes. i hate this whole reading a million pages. i mean i don't mind reading i really don't. i just have to like force myself to do it. i procrastinate too much. that's going to be one of my new year's resolutions. ahhh all american rejects "dance inside" just came on my ipod hah i love this song. anywho. we went to another frat party on...saturday. it was boring. the only reason anyone went was for free beer and i don't drink beer and anyway i was DD so that worked out. blah. i have some things to do but i don't feel like it. i think we're going to the gym later. we learned in freshman seminar today that you need exercise in college no matter how healthy you think you are hah. i suppose that's true. i could use some extra endorphins...and the burning of some calories. i don't think i've gained weight since i've been here though. we're mostly too lazy to get food so we just starve or eat little snacks around the "house" which is what we like to call the suite. umm anyway i can't think of much else going on. school is going good for the most part which i'm happy to say. me and the boy are doing good too. yeah the bf. if you didn't know, now you do. call me if you want more details bitches. well i'm getting sick of this at the moment. i promise i'll start writing more often. later.

Thursday, August 31, 2006

good fortunes and the passing time

so i let myself down by not writing about my boring, yet no so boring life lately, and i feel bad about it. i know there are avid readers checking my blog everyday looking for updates, and i'm sorry. but i do have a life now, i'm in college give me a break jeez. kidding. i guess i have had spare time, but i spend it in other ways now than sitting on my computer babbling about gosh knows what. still, its fun to recap what has happened in the past hour/day/week, whatever. so onto that.

i've been here at uncc for what? like...two weeks exactly today actually. i can't complain. i've met like zillions of people, made some good friends, learned my way around campus, for the most part. and other cool stuff. so i mean, that's good. i feel right at home already, and i love school. i will probably never say that again. ever. but yeah it's really not that bad. i guess i haven't hit the peak of the actual work but i'll get there and then i'm sure i'll be hating life. oh well. what else is new....? umm. i'm listening to make tonight (emanuel) and i love this song. haha. that's not important. i miss my friends. my girls! just fyi. if you read this haha. i hope everyones liking school so far. i can't wait to come home and see everyone and how they've changed, or not changed. i'm upset because i'm still 17 and i can't go to all the cool clubs around here. my 18th birthday is going to be amazing, that's all i have to say. oh yeah, and i have a cough. it sucks. nyquil is good though.

want to hear about my professors? probably not but i'm going to write it anyway. so my global connections teacher looks like mr. flood and uses sarcasm in about 99% of his words. he's got a dry, but funny and amusing humor. i don't mind that class. i hope i pass it. freshman seminar...the lady is really nice, she's like a mom. she is a mom, but i mean, she's really...loving? i don't know. i like her alot too though. my astronomy lab teacher is a little off the wall but he seems like a decent dude. my math teacher on the other hand is from africa and he kind of freaks me out..i can't understand him sometimes and he is teaching us stuff we already know but it's like uber easy so i'm not going to complain, you know? did i cover my pop culture teacher. yeah he sucks. it's not like he's mean, its just that that is the LONGEST class i have because it's once a week and this man has the personality of a cardboard box. imagine that. needless to say that's a great class. i don't know which one is my favorite yet. we'll see. besides classes, school isn't bad. i went to a frat party last weekend, that was an experience. i'd go again hah. me and nicola (my suitemate) danced our drunk asses off. goodtimes. what else....oh um we had a fire alarm go off today but apparently there is no need to go outside because its just a drill. i looked like death so that's a good thing i didn't have to go far. and now i need to go get ready because i have math class soon. it better not pour on me. the weather today is shitty, but i like it.

Friday, August 18, 2006

college life and other random thoughts

well for starters, i am no longer writing to you from HOME. i am at college. can you believe it? yeah neither can i. but my room is pretty much setup and whatnot. i still have some stuff to put away and hang on the walls but i'll get there. my roommates (theres 3 of them) brought a LOT of stuff. but its good. i love being in a suite. sorry to brag for those of you who are stuck in a 2x4 room. but yeah, our bathroom is adorable and our living room is cute we have a coffee table and everything. sooooo needless to say i think its going to be a good year. i hope. hah. i moved in yesterday and i felt so weird. but it was funny watching all the kids and their parents with all of their stuff. and i thought i packed alot. hah. yeah right. then again my house is all of ten minutes away so i can go back and get anything anytime. so i guess thats...sort of good. anyway, i got all settled yesterday and unpacked my room. and then..i went home with my mom and brother and sister. none of my roommates were staying the night so i was like ok...guess i won't either. so i had a peaceful night of sleep in my own bed. speaking of beds, mine here is like 5 feet off the ground requiring me to like high jump onto it. i could lower it but then all of my stuff wouldnt fit under the bed so who knows. i'm bored. i think i'll go do some more unpacking. oh yeah, in the hallway theres a giant bulletin board by the elevator and the RA's stapled condoms all around the border of it. thought that was amusing. most of them are gone. go figure. (and no, i didn't take any) haha. i'll update as soon as something interesting occurs around here. adios.

Wednesday, August 16, 2006

breathing should be an easy task

I figured it was necessary to write now because tonight's a pretty big deal. At least I think it is anyway. This is the last time I'll sleep in my bed for..who knows how long. Not that I couldn't come home whenever but I mean it'd sort of ruin the idea, ya know? I can't believe how much stuff is necessary to bring to school when you're living on your own. It's all so crazy. We're growing upppp. Ahhh. I wish my dad was here to help me move in tomorrow. I don't know why he has to go work in Florida now. I don't want to move again. But I'm used to it, and I'm out of school so I guess it shouldn't matter. Anyway...I can't believe this is all happening. It really does feel like yesterday that summer was just beginning. There was so much ahead, and now...there's school to look forward too but still...I don't know. I'm so nervous. My dad thinks that I will be loving it within 4 hours, so he says. We'll see about that. I just want to meet some cool, down to earth people. Things still aren't sinking in though. But I did look at my nightstand earlier and was packing stuff I need, and I grabbed my jar of vaseline (which I use as lipgloss!) and for some reason that sort of set me off. My eyes watered a little...I didn't cry, but I was close to it. I'm just really going to have to get used to things changing. Not just moving away from home or being away from md and all my friends, but the fact that high school is over. The drama won't be the same. No lockers, no "early release for snow" or bells or hall passes. Those are the things I think in a way I'll miss. But honestly like, you can't go back. Even if you wanted to. Things will never ever be able to be like they were. Everyone is moving on, everyone is going away and getting on with their lives. I don't know why I just thought of the quote "Life sucks, then you die" but that isn't all entirely true. I mean yeah, I complain about alot of things- I'm not gonna lie haha but I have some amazing friends and a good family, and we've shared alot of memories together that I would never take back. I don't regret anything I've ever done. If anything I've learned from it, and laughed it off or just put it in the back of my mind, you know? I think in order to feel good about change you need to believe that life is worth living. All of it- the good, the bad, and the ugly. Approximately 12 hours from now I'll be moving into my room and meeting new people and who knows how I'll be feeling, but hopefully I'll survive. I guess I'm ready. Onto new things...

With a new school year comes a new tv show, and well although it's not new it's a new season. Season 3 Laguna Beach premiered tonight. Reminds me why I love/hate high school. Some girls are really mean. Ever heard of a little thing called empathy? Apparently some people haven't. What a shame. But I think this season will be pretttttty interesting. You know how there are just some people you never get over? Well sometimes there are just shows that I will never get over. Like lame-oh Laguna Beach. ahhhhh


i wish someone was here to slap me.
well, wish me luck. i'll let you know how it goes.

Tuesday, August 15, 2006

sweet tunes end a bittersweet summer

i'm not gonna lie. i think the title of this blog is pretty creative haha. it really speaks for what i'm trying to say, like...i'm listening to good music as in..."far away" by nickelback. i'm not a huge nickelback fan but this song is just like..heartbreaking and i can't get enough of it for some reason. i also can't get enough of chris brown "say goodbye" two extremes but eh whatev. anyway, back to the title of this blog, sweet tunes, as in good music, are certainly ending and also signifying the beginning of a new part of life-the complete end of high school and well, childhood i suppose you could say, and the start of new experiences in college. i am uber nervous about going away on thursday. i guess it won't sink in until i'm actually there. we'll see.

so i left home aka st marys county today. awh how sad. i hate driving that long, and yeah goodbyes are no fun. luckily we all held it together good, it was more of a....i'll see you later. i mean, i'm guessing my friends are getting used to saying goodbye to me haha as sad as that is. they know i will always come back. so no worries. still, it was sad. we had good times though.

recap of the past...7 days:
-haircut, free stuff
-olive garden
-sleeping in
-getting burnt to a crisp at lindseys
-waldorf trip with linds and meg (oh, what a night)
-good breakfast's
-college shopping
-jamie and deirdra adventures (parties and donut connection)
-final destination 3 is scary
-kels, dei, rob, colb at donut connection for hours playing scratch off lottery tickets
-she's the man is the best movie ever
-going to see step up just for channing tatum
-kristen ash and i are the weirdest people alive- (some nicknames are just not appropriate)
-french fries for breakfast?
-church is not the same anymore, but on sunday it was perfect (reunion)
-monterey is amazing
-frosties are worth it no matter how far you go for them, and how much you spill on yourself while driving, try a snack wrap

that's it for now. if i think of anything else i'll write it the next time, but yeah....this week was a great ending to the summer. there is really nowhere i'd rather be than at home in that godforsaken county with the best friends a person could ever ask for. i'm going to miss it haha. well...cheers.

Thursday, August 10, 2006

sunburn on rainy days still hurts

i'm alive and kickin'. why that is a saying, i couldn't tell you. are you only supposed to say it if you do karate or tae kwon do or something? who knows, but i am alive. i say this because on tuesday when i drove a whole 6 hours straight by myself with my sister relaxing by my side, i got extremely sick when i finally arrived home. i got into smc around oh...i don't know 5, and dropped kari off at her friends house. i was supposed to go to lindseys where i have been staying for the past 2 nights but that was all the way in leonardtown and i had to be back in wildewood at 7 for a haircut for my sister and i. i felt so incredibly crappy that i broke into kristens house and passed out on her couch for an hour or so. kari thought i forgot to get her and so she got a ride to the salon herself and i met her there. anyway, i finally got up the strength to get up and drive myself over there and take her and her friend home. then i proceeded to go to lindseys and pretend like i was feeling ok, when really, i was dying. my head was pounding and my stomach hurt so bad. ughh. worse than like any hangover. but so we were about to have some frozen pizza, cause well, that's how the barrett's do dinner on a tuesday night, and of course i get all pale and dizzy and have to passout upstairs in lindseys bed at 7:30. didn't get up til 11:45 that night when she was about to go to bed herself. so much for having a great welcome back night. but anywho...

the next day i felt like a million bucks. we just wanted to chill and hang by the pool, get some sun. boy did we (mostly me) get sun. you should see how red i am. i look like rudolph, my nose is like bright red. and asians DO get burnt, at least this one does. even if i am only half. the white side of me got the best of me yesterday and i am paying for it now. ugh i can't WAIT til it starts peeling! sike. anywho, later last night me, linds, dei, megan, steph, jesse and dei all went to olive garden in waldof. and anyone who has been to olive garden knows there's no need to elaborate about it after you stated that you went there for dinner. it was awesome. period. SO, after dinner me, linds and megan drove back home and changed clothes, and went back UP to waldorf where we partied hard with burke, and his friend kilby, and a bunch of other people i have never seen in my life, or will ever probably see again as a matter of fact. but that's life. it was an interesting night. i didn't drink too much, seeing as i was DD, (yay me) but it wasn't that bad. watching drunk people is kind of entertaining, but after awhile it sucks unless you're one of them too, especially when they get...retarded. anyway...i don't know. we made it home alive finally at around four and fell right asleep at lindseys dad's house. oh..what a night.

this morning lindseys dad and stepmom made us an amazing breakfast. thanks for that by the way, if you ever find yourself reading this. and then we kinda just layed around. it's really rainy today, sort of the perfect day for a hangover hah. although i didn't have one so i felt pretty freakin' good minus the fact that my face feels like it has third degree burns on it, eh what can you do? nothing really except excessively apply moisturizer on it so you can still make facial expressions. but that's just me. so we finally got dressed, megan went home, and linds and i ran some errands around the county. i got my laguna beach season 2 collectors edition dvds so i am content with life right now. it's actually playing right now. i also bought some plastic cups, plates, hair ties, an eye pencil sharpener, and the dvd of what else, "just friends" that was conveniently on sale for ten bucks. so that was that. oh yeah, we went to chik fil a too. then came home. now the day is winding down and who knows what we're going to do tonight, or for the rest of the time i am here, but i'll let you know as soon as it happens.

it would have sucked to go to warped tour today,'s raining. but might've been kinda tight. oh well, i'm poor.

Monday, August 07, 2006

halos, books, and dark laundry

sometimes monday's aren't so manic. and even if they were, why would anyone want it so be sunday? i mean yeah sunday's are good for getting last minute homework done and going to church but other than that, sunday's are just a forewarning that mondays are coming. so that's dumb. is monday and it wasn't so crazy. i got up at 11 something, and then i don't even know what i did all day...watched movies, did pilates, took a shower, did laundry. actually i'm still doing laundry. i don't really mind though. earlier tonight we took a drive into the city and drove all the way through it til we got into south carolina in which we went to game stop for my brother and his friend. it was a pretty pointless trip for me, but i had nothing better to do tonight. i'm trying to think of what i need to pack since i haven't done that yet. most likely i'll end up passing out tonight and doing it tomorrow morning while kari aka the most anal OCD person ever will scream at me to hurry up so we can leave. eh whatever we'll get there. and that's what i like to think, but sometimes you really do need to like...take initiative when it comes to certain things. i am pretty lazy, and i procrastinate alot- i'm not gonna lie. but i know when i need to step it up. anyway i don't know what i'm talking about.

i had another weird dream last night, in a nutshell- i was out on a lake boating and doing some sort of water sport, but it was unusual because the water sport was putting a rope around your neck while being pulled either frontwards or backwards. weird i know. infact it's quite morbid. ugh. on the bright side, i got a package in the mail today and everyone knows that that's one of the best feelings in the world. another one of my random amazon orders came in. i ordered that book "tuesdays with morrie." i saw the movie and that was my inspiration to get the book, which i think will be equally as good. anyhow i need to go check my laundry. i don't know when the next time i'll have enough time on a computer to write one of these, so don't hold your breath, because tomorrow i'll be home in MD :) maybe i'll see YOU (if you're cool enough that is) <3

crowded malls do not have my name on them

aw, i love this song. "long talks" by the early november. it's my jam of the night. anyway, i have something else to complain about tonight. shopping malls. everyone who knows me knows that i do not like shopping all too much. i mean yeah, i like it when i'm in the mood and when there's some sales going on, but honestly, you will most likely not catch me in a mall when there is bound to be a million people out shopping. i like my personal space when i'm trying to buy clothes. so this weekend was tax free weekend and of course my parents drag me out to concord mills which is wicked packed with every person in the state of north carolina. shoot me. i couldn't even breathe in there. though i managed to find some good deals. i got 5 tops and a pair of jeans from various stores such as the gap, american eagle and old navy. yea, thats about it. so the day didn't turn out all that bad but honestly- never again.

now that that's off my finger is getting better. it sort of looks like a blister now. i can bend it finally. i have a headache again. i think frequent headaches are bad for you. whats wrong with meee?! oh yeah, my dvd player broke. son of a bitch. and a dvd that i rented is trapped in it. poor thing. it was a horror movie called "camp slaughter" haha and it was almost at the end til this pos died on me, or whatever the hell is wrong with it. so now i don't know if the people live or die. don't you hate that? i'll probably be up all night contemplating it. but maybe not. i've been having really weird dreams lately. they're sort of freaking me out. i'll even wake up for a few minutes then fall back to sleep into the dream where i left off. like i'm having dreams about people i never see or talk to, or like...i'll be in one place at one point then all of a sudden in a different place. for example: last nights dream went as follows- there's a giant room with huge glass windows and its spinning like its on an axis, everyone from the senior and junior class is there and sitting against the walls, and we're playing a game. one person is like "it" and gets to ask three underclassmen a question in which they answer and if they get it right then its their turn. anyway i choose like three juniors who...aren't even juniors yet. then i started talking to an old friend about a new car she is getting from her dad. all of a sudden it's winter and i'm walking around my old neighborhood dragging a red wagon behind me in the snow and it's freezing and i go to my sister's friends house and her friend gives me a head band to keep my ears warm and then i leave and start walking home. oh and also, part of this dream contained the whole cross country team from sophomore year. i like quit the team and everyone got pissed at me. that's all i can recall at the moment. this dream took place all in one night. i have no idea what it means but definitely another "random jamie dream" my head still hurts. i'm going to sleep.

Sunday, August 06, 2006

finger burns and airports

I felt like I had to write something today...or well..tonight I guess because my day was actually interesting. Well, not really but I wanted to express my new hatred for hair styling products. More specifically, the straightener. You see, I need a really hot one because I have wavy/curly hair that refuses to go straight unless under extreme heat. So i got this cool new one that goes to like 400 something degrees, and as I am using it today to get ready to go out to the store, what do I do? CLOSE IT ON MY LEFT HAND POINTER FINGER. Yeah, I guess it was my fault but come on, these things should come with labels "be careful of burning your fingers" who knows. But yeah so it's been killing me all night. It hurts like the dickens. The tip of my finger sort of looks plasticy...its kinda gross actually...ugh. Anyway,

The air conditioner broke in Hollywood Video. Usually it's really cold in there and feels pretty dang good compared to outside, but today it was like a sauna. I was about to faint. And my finger felt like it had a burning heart in it. Ouch. But then my Dad and I went next door to Harris Teeter, which is a common grocery store down in NC for those of you foreigners, and it was nice and cool. We got mint chocolate chip ice cream. Need I say more? Oh yeah, then an hour later we all went to the airport to pick up my brother's friend, Daniel. Seriously, there was no reason for me to go but I have an unusual love for airports. I like seeing all the different people going in and out the terminals, reuniting with friends and family, sleeping on couches, listening to ipods. I wonder where all of these people are from and where they are going. Is that weird? Whatever. So airports are cool. My finger hurts still, I should just go to sleep and save myself from feeling anymore pain. Tomorrow (today) is Sunday which means church. Fun stuff right there. I just don't like getting up early. Anyway I am rambling now so enough said. Goodnight.

Friday, August 04, 2006

spare time and darla love

so i'm on the phone with Kristen now and of course, we are bored as bored can get. and we start talking about one of our favorite movies "just friends." now if you haven't seen this, you must. and if you did see it, and don't think it was anything special- you are retarded. this movie has the best quotes. speaking of which, when a movie has good quotes, the only thing to do of course is record them and set them as your ringtones, duh. so since i don't have the dvd and kristen does, she put it on and recorded our favorite parts on her cell and sent them to mine. this includes "its ok, i like girls-DARLA!" and "hello...joyce..hello?" and "i'm sorry i'm not the most boring person ever ok. God. I'm sorry i'm not poor. i'm sorry i don't have a fat ass!" and many more. SO. what a good night.
oh can i say something else. pilates is so fun. you need to do pilates. wait what else did i want to say...oh yeah. look up the times for mtv and see when the episode about the kid named Jordan who wants to be homecoming prince is on. it is possibly the funniest made episode i've ever seen. it's up there with the gay soccer player Josh even. so seriously, watch it. if you are bored, check out jeff kummer's blog (the drummer from the early november) . that man is freakin' hilarious. or if you're like me you can check and see all of the new things hilary duff is getting herself into these days. another favorite pasttime of mine is playing games on seriously...don't underestimate this site. oh yeah, shout out to my lover matt who proudly listens to the high school musical soundtrack :) so i can't help i have no life at the moment. i just moved here what do you expect? but um..4 days til i'm home in the smc stayin with blinz and kpax. that's exciting. <3

ps- vishal doesn't hate me anymore!

high notes and old photographs

it's really not necessary for me to start one of these, but since i've got time. and i don't mind writing, i thought i would give it a try. after all, new chapters in life deserve new things, such as a new blog. and anyway, i'm sick of the way xanga is layed out, plus that blog is more personal i guess you could say. hopefully someone gets entertainment from reading what i'll write in this. anyway...

i need to give kudos to kristen who has been my inspiration for this blog. thank you. mine will probably never be as good as yours but hey i can try right? here is a snippet of what she has in her most recent post: "So Jamie and I had an interesting phone conversation last night. We made fun of poor people in the yearbook for like 2 hours. Why? We are us. But honeslty, there is a such thing as picture retake day. Then I have to side with those people because sometimes you get a bad picture aka 11th grade eewww. And you have to go on a field trip on make up day so you can’t always help it." It really doesn't get any better than that. And yeah, that is what we talked about last night at like 12 am. Because we can. I guess.

SO. onto new and better, actually, no not better things. Worse things. Vishal is officially mad at me right now. Why, because I was joking around about his knee. I don't understand. Me and him are always cool, he is like never mad. And he knows how completely retarded I am about like..well everything, so I don't know why he like freaked out on me. Anyway that's what is on my mind and obviously its bothering me. I hate when I'm on bad terms with my friends. Not a good feeling. I hope this doesn't last long.

I'm going home to MD soon and finally won't be bored to death here in charlotte with the fam anymore. so thank God for that. I can't waitttt :) Spending my last week of summer at home should be goodtimes. I'm still coming realizing that things are ending. I already feel like people are separating from each other..and it's sad. I hate change, but I guess sometimes it's for the best.