when you hear this song i hope that it will give you hell

i'm sitting on the couch at cody's being unproductive on my computer while he sits next to me, still dirty and smelly from work, watching jerry mcguire. i'm not sure what this movies all about, but i do know renee zellwegger annoys me. i think its her voice....anyway.

i went to see twilight tonight with my sister, finally. and as told, it did not live up to expectations of those who read the books. the acting needed work, and it was filled with awkward moments and shaky camera angles i didn't really enjoy. the music was okay, the scenery was wayyyy too fake and made me mad. but other than that, they kept the story pretty well i guess. anyway, let's hope that new moon (the second book) that gets turned into a movie, because it is going to, is better than twilight.

on another note, i can't stop laughing about kristens newest blog about her family. mostly about her dad making an excel sheet for all of the thanksgiving food they need. that really made my day, and i got a good LOL out, literally. alright well, i don't have much else to rant about...

never think

i'm laying here in cody's bed and nobody is home here. he's at the bar with his cousin and i've decided to raid their house since my best friend was here alone (my computer). i thought i'd blog for a moment. just a short one i think. i don't have too many thoughts i'd like to express, but there's a few i suppose.

first off, it's been freezing in charlotte the past few days. i'm indoors and i can't feel my nose. i think i'm getting a sinus infection or something too. can anything get worse? i went to the uncc vs clemson game tonight and we lost by one point which is sad, but that's life. it's a game and you win some, you lose some. regardless, life goes on. but i got a free jack in the box tshirt that i don't want so i'm giving it to cody. its an ugly shade of red and says "for your late night foody call" on the back. haaaaa. wow. how cute. but yeah, and i got free coupons for a milkshake or something. what else?

oh of course. today was awesome. cody and i went up to mooresville to go to the lazy 5 ranch. it's a 3.5 mile safari type drive you just drive through with your windows down and see all the animals and feed them. we got bombarded by these elk/deer/buffalo animals and it was insane. see the pics on my facebook soon. but yeah, we saw all kinds of deer, elk, rhino, birds, pigs, llamas, camels, giraffes, zebras. it was really neat and we had a blast :) overall, good day. i haven't had a saturday off in so long so it was really nice.

i can't believe november is almost over. it seems like yesterday it was halloween. i'm baffled (that's a kristen word i think) haha anyway i'm baffled at how fast time goes by. i wish i could rewind my life and relive certain moments from this summer. mostly because i want more time. more time to spend with the people that mean the most to me. i'll never understand why life works out the way it does. i guess its all choices. i'm not sure about fate or destiny anymore..but i'm trying to convince myself there is something to look up to...someday....

it's 2 am and i'm cursin' your name

so...what to say, what to say. things are not going as planned, and that's the usual. i am doing horrible in several of my classes and it seems the more i study, the worse i do. how does this happen? according to kristen it is murphys law, which just happens to be based on my life. anyway,

not much has happened in the last few days. i am caught up on all of the saw movies, except for saw 5. they are good and i wish i watched them earlier hah. umm..i went to the gym last night for the first time in like a week. bri almost fell off the tredmill while she was facing me talking, and that made my night 10 times better lol. i dropped my underwear in the middle of the living room in front of kristen's friend casey last night and that was embarassing. all in all, nothing great is going on.

i want to touch on kelseys most recent blog about the whole songs that bring up memories of the past that you're just in the mood to remember. yeah i totally feel you on that. its sad how a memory can ruin a song thats actually really good. ugh. i'm tired and i don't know why. its freezing outside and i love it but i hate that it won't snow.

cause i'm your baby

ok so i'm really lame and listening to ll cool j & the dream "baby" and i only like it because of the chorus that goes "cause i'm your baby, your baby, your baby, your baby.." well its catchy to me, okay.

i'm laying in cody's bed being unproductive, though i did update his ipod for him, and read a chapter of my book of the moment which is eclipse, the third book of the twilight series. i can't get enough of this. and i think its time i write why i really like this book.

the twilight series is pure fantasy. it's completely unrealistic in every single way and i think that's why i relate to it so much. i am an unrealistic person in many ways. a dreamer if you will, hence my hotmail email (dreamer..etc etc @hotmail.com) which i made in like 6th grade, but it does apply to the wanders of my mind. back to twilight, if you didn't know, it is a love story about vampires and humans- primarily a senior boy and girl named Bella and Edward who are madly, annoyingly, weirdly in love. and its addictive and i'm jealous. though their close love makes me sick, i admit i envy it and live vicariously through bella. you need to read these books to understand the obsession i suppose, but i promise it will be worth it. if you refuse to read it, at least go see the movie when it comes out november 21st. i sure am! ha...

well this week was complete shit except for the fact that i got taylor swifts album, and that was the only good thing that came from this week i swear. i failed two tests and am worried to death i will not graduate on time. i have 18 credits next semester which basically means i will be living in a darker cave than i already do now. plus i will not have my boy around to escape to when i don't want to do schoolwork. that is depressing and i plan on maximizing my spare time watching surfthechannel.com catching up on tv series that i either missed or always wanted to watch such as the last two seasons of grey's anatomy and all of gossip girls. oh, and i plan on getting addicted to exercise. this has always been a dream of mine but somehow i can't bring my body to agree with my mind. maybe someday this will happen. one can only hope.

i have no new cool stories except that i got my teeth cleaned yesterday and today at work some lady told me that while she was standing in line to check out she was thinking about how i looked like one of the models in the huge poster behind the desk. thanks, i guess. uhhhhh i'm going to bed.

my zen day calendar

friday, september 10, 2008.

"the fact is, the universe has chosen you as the vehicle through which to experience the uncanny thrill of cutting up cabbage for dinner, the wonder that is inhaling oxygen and exhaling carbon dioxide, the fabulous spectacle of watching your laundry dry at a coin-op laundromat where the radio is stuck on an E-Z listening station and an old lady keeps staring at you for no discernible reason. The universe has demanded that you be you. Ain't no avoidin' it"

-Brad Warner

I just thought this was funny because though I could come up with a way worse situation for my own life, it was still kind of funny, and true.

you're the only thing i know like the back of my hand

oh here we go again..a new day, a new obsession, something else to get me excited about so i get through the day in one piece. taylor swift's new album, fearless, came out today and of course i got it on itunes. it's awesome. and no wonder number 2 on itunes album charts. so far "breathe" is my favorite song on the album. and yes, its a depressing one. i feel it will be tied to events coming up in my life (cody moving away). and i of course will sit alone in my room and think about why life happens the way it does, why it happens to me, and if i'm the only one going through pain and heartache right now. i ask myself alot of questions during the day. its weird because sometimes i almost, and i mean jussstt almost catch myself talking aloud to myself. like whispering. a dull whisper, that no one would understand because it sounds like mumbling. but yeah...its crazy, and i wish i could stop dwelling on every little thing. people have been doing things that annoy me lately. and whats funny about it is that the people that are doing the things that annoy me are complete strangers. let me elaborate in the next paragraph.

1. people who drive in the dark without their lights on. -- seriously i hope you crash because you're an idiot.
2. people who feel the need to speed in 5 o'clock traffic. --you're not gonna get anywhere faster. i almost died yesterday because of this.
3. people who drive 10 under the speed limit.-- you should have your license revoked.
4. people who speed up when they know you need to get over. --fuck you. you're an asshole.

well i can't think of anything else about drivers right now that pisses me off but you get the gist. anyway, i'd like to note to kristen that i really liked your newest blog in your..2nd blog i think. about like change and some other stuff but it got me thinking about alot of things that i don't really like thinking about. also, kels i read your blog too, i can't believe its been five years either. it's weird the way that no matter what happens in life, it does go on and there's not much you can do about it. ughhhhhhhh. i don't know what else to write about right now. i need to study.

You’re the only thing I know like the back of my hand,
And I can’t breathe,without you,
But I have to.

-taylor swift

quickie

gotcha with the title. haha oh i'm so funny. ok just wanted to post my a couple of my favorite quotes from twilight.

I’d already lived through the worst thing possible. In comparison with that, why should anything frighten me now? I should be able to look death in the face and laugh.” -bella swan


“One thing I truly knew - knew it in the pit of my stomach, in the center of my bones, knew it from the crown of my head to the stoles of my feet, knew it deep in my empty chest - was how love gave someone the power to break you. I’d been broken beyond repair.” -bella swan

this ain't no holiday for me

so my hilary duff obsession is still going strong and i am freaking cause i'm in love with her new song "holiday" that's going to be on her best of album out on november 11!!!!!!!! anyway, its really good.

something happened monday afternoon and i was given horrible horrible news by someone i love very much. it hurt me....alot. i hope everything works out.

on a lighter note, obama won yesterday and i am proud to say i voted. its going to be an interesting next four years. i'm down for whatever. well, there's alot more i could say but i don't feel like elaborating today. maybe tomorrow....

I remember summers, you & me lasting forever
Holidays come & we'd never, never ever be apart
I remember spending, all of my time, every minute
The two of us we had our own rhythm, intune with the beat of my heart

Now in the summer (I miss you)
& in the winter (I miss you)
It don't matter (what I do)
Since you went away, since you went away
Now in the summer (I miss you)
& in the winter (I miss you)
It don't matter what I do
It don't matter what I say
You left it

You took a holiday from us
Took a trip & left your love
If your heart wasn't down forever
You should have told me where it was
You took a holiday from me
I guess you needed to be free
Would have loved you with no measure
& now you got me asking
Where (where did you go huh?, where did you go huh?)
Where (where did you go huh?, where did you go huh?) did you go?
(where did you go huh?) Where did my heart go?
You took a holiday
Where (where did you go huh?, where did you go huh?)
Where (where did you go huh?, where did you go huh?) did you go?
Why did you leave?
This ain't no holiday for me

Walkin', watching you leave there's no talking
Back in my arms it's so shocking, guess forever was just a dream
I think we could have made it, but our history now is fading
My image of the future is changing & baby damn that thing called destiny, got the best of me

Now in the summer (I miss you)
& in the winter (I miss you)
It don't matter what I do
It don't matter what I say
You left it

You took a holiday from us
Took a trip & left your love
If your heart wasn't down forever
You should have told me where it was
You took a holiday from me
I guess you needed to be free
Would have loved you with no measure
& now you got me asking
Where (where did you go huh?, where did you go huh?)
Where (where did you go huh?, where did you go huh?) did you go?
(where did you go huh?) Where did my heart go?
You took a holiday
Where (where did you go huh?, where did you go huh?)
Where (where did you go huh?, where did you go huh?) did you go?
Why did you leave?
This ain't no holiday for me